You can't have one...

And Church of the Latter-Day Zarathustra

Putting the "ass" back in "Asperger's" since 2003

My mission from God:
Helping my timid geek brothers remember WTF they really are

My motto: You can't spell "systems analysis" without "anal"!

...Without the other!

The Latter-Day Zarathustra
__Hi, I'm Faye, math/science Jedi and geek fuck-cult goddess. I answer emails (eventually) at KneeCheeseZarathustra@gmail.com . BTW, The blog supposedly by me that says I'm really laughing at you is a fake by a disgruntled stalker. This blog is about remembering that being an intelligent animal means being both intelligent AND an animal. It's also about astrophysics, and being naked and whipped. I'd rather TALK ABOUT astrophysics, but I'd rather BE naked and whipped. After college, there was nothing interesting to pay attention to and I was horribly shy and afraid of boys. So I just leaned against the wall for years, smoking cigarettes and waiting for something wonderful to happen to me, but I didn't know what. Then, after I'd given up, it happened in 2001. Curious about what it's like to be a nonconsensual sex slave like the girls in the news, I took off all my clothes in a basement and let myself be gagged, tied to a bench for days, tortured sexually and gang-raped nonstop by every drunk, stupid redneck in Brunswick and their friends. It was a very bad idea. But it was also a liberating, religious-like Revelation from God. I discovered what I always was: an animal body, born to mate and die ...and that I LIKE that. I now know that thinking and feeling are both "you", and it's critical that they keep the hell out of each other's way. I want you wretched, useless geeks to dig up and embrace the scary feelings you buried so long ago when mommy said they were "bad," and do it while you're you're still young. I even use shock therapy on you pointless Poindexters, because suppressing the sexual anger is why you dorks are in such horrible sadness and despair that you actually consider killing yourself so you won't have to endure another day without the thrilling joy of becoming an animal again and fucking someone who's body is like mine. My legs spread the Good News for all-too-modern man, for I preach the Eternal Gospel of cheap, meaningless sex with complete strangers. That's why they call me the psycho, active, psychoactive, hyperbolic, hypergolic, St. Vitus' dancin', pull down her pants and masterpiece-makin', masturbatin', window ledge over-the-edge, screwy, chiral, downward-spiral, ass upended, fair-weather-friended, 'puter freq girl geek. Moses said "Let my people go!" I say, "Let my people CUM!" Let them come to my sermon on the "mount!" For I am the Moses of Mount. I am the Jesus of Jizz. I am the Latter-Day Zarathustra.I live naked in a cave
My comix
Oboy, naked pix!
Vids of me tied up & fucked
Faye Fuck FAQ
My 3 days as a sex slave


In 2001, I eagerly let myself be gagged and tied in a basement with my legs forced apart for two days, nonstop. At the first whip slash to my cunt, I screamed and thrashed around desperately.
It was then nonconsensual, like I planned, and it never stopped. I was tortured and raped continuously by dozens of men all weekend while I pleaded and cried. You guys wanted a book about it. Okay, here.

There is no "good."_____There is no "evil."_____There is only FLESH.




First of all, there's no way to send me money even if you want to.

Someone said I was a scam, so I took the tip jar away years ago. I'm a real person.

 And I live naked in a cave in the woods.

I am an officially-diagnosed autistic-savant mutant, damned by God and doomed by Man to understand everything and control nothing.

Nice t' meet ya.

I walked off my nuc engineering job because there are only 3 kinds of people in the world: evil, retarded, and ME

...uhhh, and you.

Okay, okay; my "cave" is a tent.  What, like, EVER.  But it certainly feels like a cave in here.  A warm, safe one, too! 

Long ago and far away Faye

Click any of these pix for huge.
BTW, before you read more, a word about words: My horrible mom was a "woman", but I'm a "girl".  It's who I was as a kid, and nothing's changed.

You can completely forget "lady"!

And I call it a "cunt" because it emphasizes the disorienting, deeply mystical, awesome, shocking thing it's used for.  By men.

I was simultaneously ashamed of and terrified by sex until my religious-like revelation in 2001.

I reeeeally dislike grownups—"grups", as Mira called them.  "Old person" is a horrible, debilitating, terminal disease similar to rabies that all kids eventually catch, like chicken pox.

Except me.  I seem to be immune, like Richard Feynman. And I have no idea why.

It probably has to do with being autistic, the main symptom of which is  "emotional retardation", but I really don't care why I am like I am.  All I know is that I watched people I know get married and stop having fun.  Apparently, as soon as you get married, sex stops being thrilling! and exciting!, and becomes some kind of icky medical problem.  Then in the next two or three decades, the tragic victims get older and colder and meaner and sad. Then around 50, they emerge from their bewildered chrysalis as angry, ugly, evil monsters.  Their main purpose becomes starting wars, hoarding currency, and preventing excited, optimistic teenagers from having sex.

Ultimately, old people get even uglier and slower until they stop moving, fall over, and rot.  Then they wander around biting happy young people, just to make them sad.

When I was little, I actually believed that part about old people becoming evil zombies on a mindless mission of killing happiness.

I still do.

See, zombies are the ultimate grownups.

But you didn't come here for that kind of discussion.  You came here for THIS:
Angry, brutal rape is the essence of being male, and craving it is the essence of being female.
Don't like it?  TOUGH TITTIES!  Deny it and you end up like, well... YOU.

In 2001, when I was tied to a bench nonstop for three days by a stranger, tortured sexually, and gang-raped; I learned that no one is interested in my opinions (like the above ones), my happiness, or whether I live or die—only in my naked body.

I also learned that that's okay with me because I LIKE being tortured and gang-raped.

Well, I like being gang raped, anyway.

I even like torture, after it stops.  It's SEXY.

I'm surprised that I used to expect better from you normal people.  Out here in the nonacademic, so-called Real World, the only people who care when I'm in pain are the men staring at me and masturbating.

But after having WISED UP, I display my tits, my cunt, and my tight little pink female ASS HOLE for free,  to complete strangers on the internet because it makes me feel dirty and cheap and naughty vulgar and rude and submissive and embarrassed and sexy and happy and human; instead of like a  broken robot, which is what I feel like whenever I'm around you arbitrary, fearful, judgmental, violent, childish, greedy, dishonest, sneaky, shitty, guilt-driven, human creatures.

I didn't AWAYS live in a cave.
Fucking isn't even remotely similar to ANYTHING else we do.  It's mysterious, deep, frightening, magical, and Beyond Infinity.  It connects us directly with life and death and eternity.  It's the ONLY reason we live.

...And die.

BTW, Kubrick's 2001 was about discovering puberty, the attempt to hide it from one's self, and the two ways to deal with it (The Frank Poole way and the Dave Bowman way).  The Monolith on the moon was first masturbation and Jupiter was "the female".

Being tied to the furniture in a stranger's basement nonstop, being tortured and raped for three days was literally a religious revelation to me.  It made me remember who I really am.

And most of all, WHAT.

You guy geeks need to remember it too. Helping you do that is what this blog is about.

Until I WISED UP, I was too timid to talk to my coworkers.  it was bizarre.  But now  I have orgasms for complete strangers while staring at their picture if they order me to.  I talk to them, and rub off reading what they say they'll do to me if I'm found 'n bound 'n rammed 'n crammed 'n reamed 'n creemed.  I announced on this blog what bar I'd be in--and showed up.  None of you dorks did, but later, two of you FUCKED me.  I described all this as it happened.  Read my blog or ask the regulars.

Look, if living in a little hut in the woods was okay for Master Yoda, it's okay for  me, see?

The A/C vent is visible, next to the exit port for the urine-jettison subsystem.

...Okay, the piss funnel.  What, like, EVER.

You can tell how good the insulation is because the snow on my roof doesn't melt, yet I'm cozy and warm in here, even with no covers or clothes. 

"Kane" isn't my real name, but "Faye" is.  "Kane" is way to close for comfort, but too late to change, too late to pay, no time to stay the same, too young to leave.

I prefer to talk to smart guys, but like all girls, I prefer to be fucked by STUPID ones.  Not because they're stupid, but because they fuck for real, with feeling—unlike you dorky, frightened, question-asking, hesitant, apologetic nerds.

See, stupid guys are ANIMALS, even though they don't believe it.  Geeks believe it but don't FEEL it.

FEEL it. 


Anyway, I borrowed a phone from Patty the Spherical Christian and made these two short tour vids of my cave, narrated by me.

I mainly do  two things in here:


I learn about stuff like Riemann spacetime topology, and absorber theory.  I learn what's "behind the curtain" in quantum electrodynamics. I'm currently reading Brian Greene's book about why time is an illusion.  I even talked to him once!  Woh, HE  can fuck me ANY time!

Then again, so can anybody else. I'm trying to make up for the decades I wasted hiding from everyone before I wised up.

SKIP THIS PART (Go to "THING TWO") unless you're familiar with 3D acceleration as 4D rotation, and the metric signature of spacetime.

I go to grad school online. You can do that here in The Future. I'm also finishing the charts and doing the citations for an astrophysics paper I'm publishing. It's about the negative term in the equation that defines the 4D interval in Riemann spacetimes, and it's implications for the Hubble parameter H-zero. This is it in a nutshell:

(First of all, this is a simple explanation). If you have a right triangle with one side extending into space and one side extending into time, the length of the hypotenuse is not necessarily a real number. And when you rotate the triangle, very strange things happen. That's because the side that extends into time is just like the side extending into space, except the length of that side of the triangle is a negative number (of feet or miles or whatever). That's why physicists call time "complex space," because to figure out lengths in time using, say, inches, you have to multiply stuff by i (the square root of minus one).  That is, you have to use something called "complex arithmetic" when you rotate triangles in 4D spacetime. And there are many books that describe how to do that.

But the bottom line is, a spacetime triangle can very well have a hypotenuse with a negative length! In fact, it always will if the length of the side extending into space is "spacelike".

That's simple and has been known for 90 years.  It's in the first chapter of every book about Special Relativity.

My paper is not a "new theory;" it's just a discussion of things we already know (the stuff I just described), plus an observation about it and a computation you can do yourself on a calculator that yields the exact correct value for the H-zero parameter (the expansion rate of the universe). My value falls inside the error bars of all four of the other known ways to compute H-zero (and the space inside all those nested error bars is very, very narrow). I'm pretty sure nobody else has noticed that you can do this.

It's airtight-right. I can't have screwed it up because I don't invent anything new and I get the right answer.  I just point out stuff that everybody already knows. The calculation is simple, and I get the correct value for the Hubble Parameter. It's just that nobody else noticed that you can use this one thing we already know to calculate another thing we already know because no one ever had a real reason to think of both those things as related. But a third thing we already know (the interval metric) says that they are. I use that fact to predict (i.e. compute) the expansion rate of the universe, and I get the exact right answer.

I came up with something else that really is new (the universe as a 4D sphere with time as the radius), and it's required to do the calculation. I thought I'd have a hard time getting that part published because I'm a nobody.

But I was VERY disappointed to discover that a Chinese astrophysicist noticed that part of it too, and published it last year. Crap!  Fortunately, he didn't continue his line of inquiry because it didn't occur to him that because time intervals are space distances times imaginary unity (i), the age of the universe is, too, when expressed as distance. He quite reasonably treated the age of the universe as a positive time duration instead of a negative spatial extent. The way he was looking at it, he had no reason to consider his model from the point of view of complex space.

[Note to physics geeks: the sign difference of ct² in the metric relative to the spatial differences means that an interval extent in time alone is either a negative real distance, or a positive amount of distance which is an imaginary number (depending whether you negate both sides of the metric equation or not)].

That's actually good in a way, because now I don't have to convince people of the validity of my model, since someone with credibility invented it after I did but before I publish it.  Now all I have to do (in my paper) is hand you a calculator and point to some simple arithmetic involving the age of the universe and c.

Hi there
My work will probably get a murmur or two just because it's correct, direct, simple, new, and verifies the other four H-zero estimates. But ultimately, it's not a big deal to anyone but a small subset of physics geeks and will probably be considered a novelty or a curiosity.

However, after this is published, if anybody gives a damn about it, I'll do another paper on what this tells us about the four-dimensional shape of the hyperbolic manifold that is the universe. That stuff IS a big deal, though after reading my paper, someone else is sure to see the implications and publish first.

As further validation, the relation that lets you calculate H-zero also predicts cosmic inflation immediately after the big bang, and it predicts that inflation was very, very brief (2 pi times the Planck time).

But more importantly, it also predicts something obscure about very early inflation that Penrose and Hawking conjectured using different equations. There are a lot of other implications, too.

Still, I don't want to dump the whole thing on people all at once because I want to get credibility first by demonstrating that H-zero is related to two other values that aren't obviously related to the expansion rate until you consider the metric signature of the Einstein tensor also.Then it's actually kind of obvious.  At very least, it's correct, even if it's not important. I sure hope it's original!

NOTE: if you didn't understand the above, don't worry. It's not you, it's me. All that jargon was just nonsense from another one of those excited, crazy homeless bums, waving and raving about the amazing Truth of the Universe they just figured out.

So just say: "All that outer space 'metric' stuff, SHEE-yit!  That metric stuff is for European fags, and the only signature *I* care about is the one on my paycheck, HAR-HAR-HAR! When REAL people walk back from lunch, we ignore those wild-eyes sidewalk bums. And why doesn't somebody DO something to clean up all this worthless human garbage wandering around loose making crazy talk? Isn't that what the gummint is supposed to do with all that tax money they steal from us? Why don't they make the bums get a job and live in a house? I can't wait to get back to MY house and watch monkeys in clothes hit people with plastic baseball bats on the tee-vee set!"


The other thing I do all day is rub the nub furiously to really cruel amateur bdsm vids while imagining it's me being tortured and crying.  Safewords and kink.com are bullshit!  Even Mood Pictures is mechanical. Plus, Mood doesn't even rape the women, even though I suggested it to them.

Both ONE and TWO are equally important.  But at any time, only one of those halves of your mind can be in control: thinking or experiencing, but never both at once.  

Which one should be in charge?  

The appropriate one for that situation. The other half of you evaporates for a while.  

Don't worry, it will always come back.  You won't lose control permanently if you slip away and  experience being a mindless animal in a rage of sexual anger and feel your intelligence evaporate right before you like HAL 9000.

Sex and smart don't conflict; they compliment each other.

We'll talk more about this on the blog.

Anyway, I've got wireless broadband in here, and lots of comm equipment--most of which I found in dumpsters. (I find electronics and sell the stuff on eBay).

I've got municipal band, UHF/directional, shortwave, FM, 2.4 GHz, AM, and HDTV antennas sticking out of my roof. 

If I were one of those schizophrenic homeless people, I'd think I was in a CIA listening post!


Find the microdot in this image for the GPS coordinates of my location:

SPECIAL BONUS FOR OBSESSED STALKERS (of which there have been several):
The above pic also contains a very graphic pornographic steganographic!

I read a lot in here:

It's a JOKE, see?  The "funny" being that there can be no microdots in a digital picture.  
I guess it's "idiot savant" humor.

Oh well.  'Nother example of why I live in a cave.

Anyway, this is where I lay on my bare, indolent ass 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for over three years (as of April 2008). I put clothes on about twice a month when I go for supplies. At an average masturbation rate of about 10/day, I've fired off about several thousand orgasms, right here.  And every one of them was glorious.  

NOTE from a year later: that high nubbin-rubbin' frequency was only during my six-month experiment slathering myself daily in testosterone gel and never washing it off, to see what it's like to be as horny as a man.

My ass FOUND OUT, too!  I walk through the woods naked anyway, because it makes me feel vulnerable and sexy.  I like being scraped by the branches and I like the danger of being seen and (hopefully) raped. And I lay on my back and feel the prickly pointed stuff hurt my back and my ass, and I open my legs wide and close my eyes and pretend I was told to by a stranger who found me, pushed me down, and said "offer me your cunt, bitch".   Then I masturbate.

But during my testosterone experiment, I could bare-ly keep myself from going down on the shoulder of the interstate and doing it with my cunt on display and aimed at the cars.  I actually even did it one night, but managed to stay low in the high grass.  There's a blog item about that, too.

You may have observed that I'm very hung up on and obsessed with sex.  Blame my mom.  She's in hell now, but she infected me with her hypocritical, moralistic, pious, arrogant, fucked up propaganda when I was young enough to fall for it, and now it's so embedded that I will NEVER be free, no matter WHAT perverted stuff I do.

But I think I can make some you YOU guys free, maybe, with this blog.  In fact,that's why I do it.

I have a more personal reason for doing this, too.  I like nubbin-rubbin' while thinking of guys using my naked pictures to yank off with.  It makes me feel deliciously humiliated, dehumanized, and used. That's as close as I can come to having sex without feeling ashamed and guilty of something.  Hopefully, sometimes a reader and I do it at the same time. I wish I could know for sure, though. 

I do the blog as shock therapy, to help you worthless dorks not be afraid of people like me (ones with an extra X chromosome).  Hopefully, you won't make the same stupid, tragically unnecessary, wrong decisions I did and end up homeless and alone and frightened, too.

Since almost all geeks are guys, I orient the blog towards y'all.  Unless they're really fat, smart girls can always get dick and (ugh) "love", if they want it.  Even "ugly" doesn't matter much.  And since cute chicks are pursued, we have no fear of rejection, so most smart girls aren't all goofy and shy like you and I are.  I am anyway, unfortunately.    BTW, on serious forums I use my real last name.  Sometimes I used a "guy" name to avoid the guys being distracted, but it's been a decade since you heard "tits or GTFO" over and over and over.


Q Why did a sexy nuclear engineer like you quit your job and slack off instead? 


Q: how do you afford food and stuff?

A: Well at first I lived off my savings, which were destroyed in 2000.  Then I worked reverse-engineering databases for a maharishi-cult  asshole on the internet. But now I find electronics in the dumpster and sell them on eBay. You'd be surprised how much you can make doing that! And money goes far when all you have to buy is food and cases of bottled water.

The dumpster is next to a public storage place in the richest county in America, and when someone doesn't pay their bill, they keep the TVs and stuff they can sell immediately,  but they junk anything in sealed cardboard boxes or that they don't recognize, like (to name just a few) three brand new new $700 digitizing tablets, a broadcast-studio time-base corrector, 16 cases of gourmet coffee, and more cases of copier toner --- all of which I sold for big $$. A very nice older lady named Patty lets me use her mailing address.

I'm not rich, but I have everything I need -- which is my definition of "rich."   "To each according to his needs", and stuff.

Waiting patiently while the guy gets his dick hard so he can rape me.
I like it when they stare at me and yank off to get aroused; it makes me feel like a piece of meat.
naked FEMALE meat that's physically *desired*.  

When that happens, I'm AN ANIMAL being mated, not a bumbling, pedantic, geeky, timid, autistic broken robot like I always am.

Nobody wants broken robots.  They DO want naked girls.
No, I don't have everything I want, which is really just understanding WTF is going on around me.  But since "what's around me" is the universe, that level of understanding things requires knowing a lot more than I do about condensed matter, complex tangent bundles, Riemann tensors, quantum chromodynamics, hyperbolic spacetimes, lines with negative lengths, and higher-dimensional Anti DeSitter spaces.

...Well, okay, I guess tensors 'n tangents are easy (and obvious, if you visualize them), but there's a lot more other stuff that I DON'T know.  I understand the universe about as well as my cat.  Probably less, since Mister Kitty seems a whole lot happier.

I moved in with some of you guys once, and my rent in the group house was being the cook, maid, accountant, laundry do-er, and fuck doll.  
I wasn't allowed to wear any clothes, ever.
The guys called me into their rooms and did whatever they wanted to me.  They used my naked body on the hall floor, kitchen floor, after enema-ing me in the bathroom... anywhere.

I like it when men deposit their cum into my womb and deep up inside my ass.  I hope that someday, a man ties me down and signs his name on my hairy vulva with a soldering iron while I scream.  That's how I'll know I'm married to him.


I invented this thumbtack pin-prick device ...with emphasis on the "prick"!

Now men can hurt my sex organ when they're angry and thrust harder and faster.   And when they cum, it pierces my hairy vulva particularly deep while I accept his sperm and suffer.  It pierces my ass hole when he fucks me there... GOD!!
But It turns out that the tacks aren't  long enough to hurt much. They barely break my skin, if at all.  Version 2.0 will have long carpet tacks and use rubber spacers for adjustable pierce-depth.

> How do you get electricity?

I hacked the power grid. Sounds real techno-cool, but I only just ran a cable to a
250 volt highway-sign junction box and jacked in. Yes it is locked, but there's a right-angle adapter which is closed just with screws. I stripped the wires inside using a knife with two rolls of electrical rubber tape around the handle.  In retrospect, that was REAL dangerous.   

To test if it was live, I tossed a metal gum wrapper between the wires to see if it sparked.  But it didn't spark, it EXPLODED. The ephemeral gum wrapper detonated like a bomb, and was so bright that I couldn't hear for a few seconds or see directly in front of me for a while even though it was daylight.

How did I drop a 250 volt feed to 125 without a transformer?  Jedi magic!  I'm a mutant like the X-men, and my "power" is understanding stuff.  I'd rather be indestructible or fly or shoot ionized plasma from my eyes, but WTF.  I'm just glad I'm not the Elephant Man.

...So class, can anyone tell Miss Kane how she halved the dangerous voltage?  Anyone?  Beuller?  

Here's a hint: it was to Faye's power.

...Okay, okay; you guys keep asking me how, so here:  It was two-phase power.  See, a 250-volt wire pair is just two 125-volt wires 180º out of phase, so they're only 250 volts relative to each other.  I clamped one extension-cord wire to one of the ones I stripped.  Then I clamped the other extension-cord wire, not to the other hot wire, but to the grounded metal case.  125 volts!  Yaay!  When I saw that on the meter, I thought "y'know, sometimes I reeeally like my life!".

I hadn't said that since college--where I said it frequently.  Life outside the Holy Math and Physics Sanctuary Where All the Kids Fuck has been an unendurable nightmare.

I can't take a picture of my elegant power hack / ugly kludge to prove it (which people have angrily demanded as "proof" that I'm me), because that picture would DEFINITELY identify my EXACT location to Dominion Power when they saw the markings on the box and the pole. 

I had to run the ground line all the way to my cave because grounding it at the cave didn't work, even though grounding to the metal box worked.  Can anyone tell Miss Kane why?  

Anyone?  Beuller?  

Hint: it's the opposite of a ground loop. BTW, avoiding them was why I designed a neutron-damage monitor with RS-422 signaling through 11 feet of reinforced concrete containment rather than using the simpler, more common RS-232.  Plus, it was a high-noise environment, and the gizmo had to be fail-safe in every conceivable emergency mode.

Chained to a bed, whipped, raped while I cried, and left like that by a cruel, uncaring man. 
Sex is only good if you're desperately pleading and begging through your tears for him to stop hurting you.

How do you get internet?

I have a wireless internet connection I pay for. I used to hack internet access too (through a wireless repeater in the parking garage), but whoever owned the account either noticed that it was continually downloading very disturbing torture porn, or they just didn't pay their bill. Either way, I'm the only homeless bum in the woods with broadband internet.

I also have a small dorm refrigerator, electric grill, my few clothes (five black T-shirts, two black jeans, six black socks, and black leather shoes), my PC, my trash can (which I poop in), my teddy bear, and some other stuff in a small 'airlock' which isolates the tent door from the weather. You can't see it in the pics because it was winter and the inner airlock door is closed. The door is at the 'pillow' end of my bed. I have a color TV camera hidden outside so I can see if anyone's out there. Once, a pair of Spanish kids fucked right next to my cave and I took screen shots.  NOTE: link broken by fucked-up myspace censors.  I'll repost on blogger.

The question I get asked most often after "are you real" and "'can I fuck you" (the answers are "yes" and "yes"), is:

> If you're so smart, why aren't you rich?

Just as wars do not make one great, "smart" does not make one rich.   EVIL makes one rich.

> Yeah yeah, fuck the star-wars shit and answer my question.  Why the hell do you choose to be homeless when you're so SMART?

Okay.  But you asked for it:

1) Knowledge is not power.  (Truth isn't beauty, either, BTW.  And it doesn't set you free.)

I crave understanding things, but I'm not motivated to "acquire" stuff.  I'm not a Ferengi, even though they live in little huts, like me and Yoda.  

3) I'm scared to death to be around the god damn humans. They give me the creeps. They give me the willies. They give me the heebie-jeebies.  They all hate me, won't tell why, and deny it through clenched teeth.  It's probably because I don't give a shit about anything they think is important.  I dunno why, really. It's definitely not my imagination though.

4) Too much of this.  

5) Even when they're friendly, other people see me as strange, odd, weird, and peculiar, and I'm sick of it.  I don't like normal people.  I like geeks though.

6) I'm autistic and require literally NO face-to-face interaction. I can't imagine how it would feel to NEED to be around people, and I have absolutely no idea why normal people go crazy in solitary confinement. For me, it is a blessing.

Despite that, I talk to people all day and night on the internet. The people who read my blog and email me are my friends. They care about me and I care about them. Yes, I do other things: I work online, I learn stuff, I eat, I sleep, I masturbate, and I poop in the trash can. But what I do for most of my time is read emails and talk to the people who read my blog.

I got more reasons, too.

I only leave my little hidey-hole about twice a month. I usually take a cab back, unless Patty the Spherical Christian gives me a ride. I have no windows in here and when I look at my system tray clock, I don't know if it's AM or PM.  Nor either do I care.  Last winter, I didn't know that it snowed all day until I read it at washingtonpost.com. I certainly don't know when it's the weekend.

I like it like that.  It lets me pay attention to things that really are important.   Does anyone really know what time it is?

Gloria Steinham said "all sex is rape".   It's true, but she made it sound like a BAD thing!

 As you can imagine, I like Camille Paglia much, much better.  She's the only person in the world who would understand me.

Sometimes I'm happy.  But only if I take my medicines (Paxil, Wellbutrin, Trazodone, Adderall).
Sometimes mice and voles get in but I trap them (I hate to do it). I wouldn't, but they have parasites and rabies.  I am REALLY fearful of rabies because it's one of the things I understand a lot.  I had ants and roaches initially, but I dumped an acre's worth of lawn insect powder on the vortex perimeter (the edges of my tent). No more insects.  When it rained, the pile of insecticide outside my cave turned into a pile of toxic slop.
But in the larger sense, EVERYTHING outside my cave is a pile of toxic slop.

> How can you defend yourself if you have to?

I USED to have a Ruger .22 target pistol until my mom stole it because she was a Liberal and "doesn't like guns".  I'm so Liberal that I'm probably a communist, but I don't see what that has to do with guns--particularly .22 target pistols.  The only defense I have in here is a kitchen knife, a hatchet, and pepper spray; but I can't see myself using any of them if a guy comes in here.  Particularly if he's seething with the sexual anger and wants to rape me, which I think is the best sex theoretically (and probably even mathematically) possible.  I hope someday a stranger makes a really small branding iron and brands his initials on my cervix while I scream.

I also get this a lot: 
> congratulations on your home - looks like it took a lot of work & planning!  i get the power supply, i get the wireless net, but where do you get water?

Bottled, plus there's a hose bib that I use in the building adjacent to me. It is a parking garage, so nobody goes behind it. Plus, it's on a very steep hill (the top is flat),and you have to go through or over a barbed-wire fence.  A future project is to install running water in my cave.

> and if water's not your main beverage, what /do/ you drink?

Lemonade, from powder. I also use the beverage powders in MREs.  I bought beer once, but only to offer a rapist.  I'll pretend to be terrified, then say "psyyyyych!", offer a cold beer to the confused bastard, and then lie on my bed smiling, with my legs spread wide open
-while verbally referring to him as a brutal, criminal rapist.   I bet THAT would freak him out!  Hahahah!

More autistic-savant humor.

Normal people don't think my jokes are funny,  but I don't understand theirs either. My humor usually involves irony, incongruity, juxtaposition,or outrageousness. ( I really did buy beer just for that, but it took up too much room in my teeny dorm fridge so now it's warm).  I probably should keep a single one cold for the rapist.  I also have a bottle of emergency Night Train (AKA throw-up wine) for myself in case someone comes in here and wants to talk to me instead of fuck me.  YOU nerds would actually do that. 

Being fucked is literally a religious revelation, every single time. And orgasm is becoming part of God, a part of evolution and the universe.  I hope I die being fucked.  Specifically, I hope I'm strangled while being raped by a stranger.  

> How much food do you buy on one trip outside

Two weeks' worth. Other than that, I almost never go outside. There's nothing out there for me.  Groceries are heavily supplemented by MREs, which I buy mail order by the case, along with EXCELLENT canned beef and pork.  I mostly eat   MREs and fresh Italian sausages I grill with onions and five types of olives        —and  Peppadew sweet picante peppers!  WOH are they delicious!  I also eat a lot of really good imported cheese from Denmark, France and Germany.  "Good" means it has a strong odor and "great" means it smells like people's feet.  My fave is Stilton.  It tastes like a cross between bleu and Havarti.  I also like Limburger, which isn't like you see on Buggs Bunny cartoons. 

Like everything else in this worthless country, the cheese in America is fake and made of plastic.

And boy, do I love cheese! I make fondue from scratch (not the premade packs) from REAL Swiss Emmenthal, white wine (that I only use for cooking), and just a bit of cherry liquor (also for cooking). And LOTS of pepper!  And crunchy French bread from the French restaurant in Annandale.  I only drink alcohol when I'm around those human creatures, but then I drink heavily--mainly before I go food shopping.  I'm not addicted to drugs, though I tried heroin when I was in a homeless shelter and got Hep C from it.  

I'm Real Smart—a nightmare existence that sux dix—and officially crazy.  I was illegally committed to a mental hospital by my mom and her unethical shrink when she saw the welts and bruises and cigarette burns on my body after I let myself be tied to a bench in some guy's basement nonstop for a whole weekend so I could see what it was like to be a sex slave for real. I had no safeword and lay on my back, gagged and naked, with my legs forced apart for 2½ days nonstop.  

I knew I would be seriously tortured sexually by sadistic strangers until I was screaming and sobbing.  And I knew I would be gang-raped continuously for almost three days, with no food, almost no water, and I had to sleep tied to the bench with a wood pole pushed so far into my ass that I'm very sure it was dangerous.  I was afraid I'd move during the three or four hours I slept, pierce my intestine, and either bleed to death or die of peritonitis.  But I think that was impossible because I couldn't move my waist at all since it was held down tightly by its own rope. 

So what was it like, being tortured and raped like in the true crime books?  WONDERFUL.  MAGICAL!  The best thing that ever happened in my life. it was literally a religious experience.  In retrospect, I wish they had kept me awake for all three days by continually fucking me, but there were nowhere near that many guys. Only one or two would come at a time and mostly I just stared up at the light bulb.   I used a LOT of KY that weekend.  i brought three tubes and Diana had to buy more on Saturday.

I wrote a detailed description of how it came about (basically, my friend's husband did that to her in the same basement and I asked if he'd do it to me).  I wrote down everything that happened and my feelings about it so I wouldn't forget and can use it as nubbin-rubbin' fuel, even when I'm 80.  You can read it HERE.  And yes,  it's really a true story.  Surprise!  Someone on the internet really is THAT crazy.

The last straw before abandoning so-called "humanity" and moving in here was the Tuesday after that, when I excitedly pulled up my shirt and proudly showed the two purple, cut, cigarette-burned ellipsoids on my chest to someone (a girl) at work who
I thought was my friend

I'm not very good at predicting emotional responses in humans. 

She told everyone else, and their reactions were HORRIBLE.  Though, true to form, nobody actually said anything about it to me.

I just walked out and never came back. Nor did I try to find a job.  That was the last straw.


> if being tortured for three days was that good, why don't you do it again?  I'd personally volunteer to [ blah-blah yank fantasies... ]

I almost didn't include that question in this because I'm kind of ashamed to say why I won't do it again: IT HURTS!!!  It hurts a LOT to be tortured for real.  I didn't like it at ALL when it was being done to me and I dread it happening again.  The "payoff" wasn't the unendurable pain, the payoff was when guys threw the whip on the floor and raped me while I cried.  GOD DAMN!!  That was the religious revelation, the feeling of total surrender, of not being a "person" anymore, but just an animal, a female mammal, a warm body to be used by a man, by evolution, and by God, each for different purposes that don't really involve ME at all.

The man's purpose is triumphant domination and ego-reinforcement; evolution's purpose it to create a new branch in the tree of life which is better adapted than I am.

God's purpose, why he/they/it designed the universe and made me be raped in it, is something I'll never know.

To me, "God" [for lack of a better term], is whatever caused and (I think guides) evolution, and it probably doesn't physically exist in our universe.  "God" may be just another name for mathematics, per se.   I think it used viruses as vectors to nudge our development in the direction they want it to go, and that's why evolution has discontinuous jumps in complexity. 

I have no idea what it looks like, so as a placeholder, I imagine it as a black, rectangular monolith—its origin and purpose, still, a TOTAL mystery.

This is my bible.

> washing/showering: you've described going to a friend's to take a shower. 

Yeah,  Pattycakes the Spherical Christian.  My mail goes to her house, too. 

> You also said you go for weeks without bathing.  Doesn't that get kind of sticky?

Not sticky, but real greasy. The bedding gets greasy too, though some of that is from masturbation, since after I cum, I'm in heaven for a while and too lazy to get a paper towel before my natural lube leaks out.  Plus, I use KY on my vibrator when I thrust it into my sex organ or ass really hard, while imagining I'm being raped.

I wash my face and hands with waterless hand cleaner and brush my teeth the normal way. I haven't cleaned my bedding in three years, but there aren't any insects anywhere near my cave because I dumped an acre's worth of insecticide around the outside perimeter.  It's  a white berm of insect death.

If you're lookin' for a DIRTY GIRL, that's ME!   :-)

> laying around for 3 years is probably not all that good for the body

So what?  It's good for the soul.  My body is just a toy for me and others to play with until it breaks.  Then it has to be thrown away.  

...That thought arouses me sexually.

Y'know, having to die without ever knowing WTF just happened (for 14 billion years) REALLY pisses me off.
...Until I touch the hair on my dark, swollen cunt and think "Aww, the hell with it!  Let's download porn!"

> are there any sports you enjoy?

Yeah, thinking.  Learning.  

...And masturbating!  

Seriously, I've made it a high art form.  I could win an Olympic gold medal in furious nubbin rubbin'.    I could win the Nobel prize for masturbation.

> why do you say "cunt" instead of "vagina"?

Because my fucked-up mother had a "vagina" and I'm nothing like her.

By an amazing coincidence, she was also a cunt.

I had a vagina too
, until I was 13.  Then it turned into a dark, swollen, hairy sex organ.  Nobody ever asked if that was okay with me, and I have a big, big problem with that.  I call it a "cunt" because what it's for is so crude.  I feel that not pointing out the distressing, unrequested, biological manipulation that God does to us is like letting him get away with it.  If he's going to do this to me, I'm not going to politely ignore it like everybody else.  And every time I'm penetrated, I think about what a strange, strange thing this is that supposedly-intelligent humans do.  Nio wonder everyone's ashamed of it and never talks about it!  That's one reason I want to be tortured during sex: it makes me pay attention to the immediate feelings in my body instead of endlessly observing and internally commenting on everything.

> I see an air conditioner in your cave but how do you keep warm in the winter?

Well, the answer's obvious, but I have a space heater that I almost never use because I never need it to stay warm.

Look, I didn't just crawl into a cardboard box under a pile of junk; I designed this place. Knowing how cold it gets, and not wanting to assume I'd always have external power, I designed it to be comfortable without added heat when it's subfreezing.  The inner surface of my cave is a tent, but on top of that are layers of blankets and leaves and plastic tarp almost a foot thick, covered with camouflage tarp, more leaves, and sticks.  And it's all topped with a creamy vanilla/chocolate coating of bird and squirrel crap.  

I can hear them walking around up there.  It's really cool.  Sometimes, I really like my life.

In the winter, It's warm enough to sleep naked on top of my blanket instead of under it.  In fact, it's SO well insulated that I have to use the A/C on 'Fan' to suck cool air in even in winter, because the PC, monitor, dorm fridge, my breath, my brain,  my cunt, and friction against my clit generate more heat than can leak out of here unless it's VERY cold outside.

I only need the space heater when it gets well below freezing out.  And only twice in three years, when it got down below zero outside the cave, have I had to sleep UNDER the blanket.   I am comfy and warm in here—vulnerable and completely exposed to the leering gaze of anyone who finds me.   

Ooo, if anyone does, will he crawl in here and fuck me, or will he drag me out and tie me to a tree?  Will he gag me and handcuff me and make me walk with him deeper into the woods on bare feet by hitting me with a sapling switch?  Will he lock me in a trunk in his van and drive for hours to somewhere isolated?

I've run many, many such scenarios through my mind ...until I cum.

But as much as I'd like those things, I hope it doesn't happen. The reason I live here is to be blissfully ALONE. And if it does happen, I'll have to move and find another hidey-hole near a power main, and that's a lot of trouble.

But while he's here, I'll let him do anything he wants to me, for as long as he wants.  And I'll like it.

I hope he ties me down and whips my cunt, savagely, like he hates me, and keeps whipping it until it's covered with bleeding, raised welts and I'm sobbing so hard I can't breathe.  Then he fucks my ass hole fast and DEEP while I lay there limp and crying.   

I think I'll masturbate again today, and think about that.

I know it's just an autistic thing, but crying during sexual torture is really the only time I ever visibly express ANY emotion.

I added a room to my Yoda-cave! Click here for pix and vids of my home(less) improvement project! 

> I don't believe you really live like this

1) So what?  Why should I care?

2) See the cell-phone videos of the outside and inside of my cave, earlier in this blog entry.

3) The fact that I live like this is actually irrelevant to my blog. Of 150* entries so far, this is the only one about how I live. In fact, if you look at the blog item dates, it wasn't until recently that I even revealed how I live. I finally made this blog entry because I had told so many people in emails that I said 'fuck it'. Plus, I'm tired of repeating all this to everyone.

*Now 6,000+ entries, including my old myspace blog.

4) My whole blog would be exactly the same without someone making the HUGE effort to build a fake homeless cave, string Christmas lights, rig up a fake piss-coated funnel, and stock it with food, books, an air conditioner, PC, radios, etc. for absolutely no reason at all.  At least, none that an autistic person would understand. You god damn normal people do all kinds of things for no reason I can see, like jealousy and revenge and rage and talking to strangers and socializing.

And love.

Oh, and as a reward for reading this far, you might like this [THAT LINK DOESN'T WORK.  I'LL FIX IT], my BDSM movie collection for you to download free -- 14 Gigs with all copyright notices and other text edited out for your pulling pleasure.   And there's no commercial Hollywood shit, either. It's all the real thing, amateur stuff where the girl isn't figuring out how much she's being paid per whip stroke.  You won't find any of my rub-off fuel on pay sites. 

Here's a pic of me naked and tied to some guy's bed:

 Unfortunately, when he finished hurting and fucking me, he untied me.

I wish men wouldn't DO that.

  And HERE'S a video of me being fucked in my ass while, as always, I was tied to the furniture.  After the guy fills me up with cum, there's so much of it that when he pulls out, it runs out of my ass hole like light-grey water.

Now, THAT'S how I like being used! 

See my cunt?  I pull down my pants and give it away FREE to any man with balls enough to order me to. 
So will every other woman.

 But you bewildered sacks o' shit won't get ANY of it because you forgot WTF you really are.

Hey Poindexter:
> are you crazy? 

Well, DUHHHHHHH!  Shit, they say there are no stupid questions, but that one really takes the cake!

I was even committed to a mental hospital once.  My only regret is that I was so shy, I never said anything to the guys (or the women, either).  If I could do it again, I'd humbly request that literally EVERY one of the male patients fucks me--again and again and again.  I know a girl who did. Three, in fact, if you include two mental hospitals.  But before I WISED UP, I was too shy to talk to anybody.  If someone spole to me, I'd freeze, then walk away embarrassed.  I mainly hid in the crazy-people  library all day.

Because we were all adults (well, physically), sex wasn't even against the rules as long as you were discreet.  (Like the Hensel twins if they get separated: they'd be discrete).  Those crazy guys were all very, very horny. And there were a LOT of them! I probably could have done nothing all day, every day but lie naked in the grass being fucked.  It could have been just like my sex slave experience in 2001, but without the torture.  I wasted that opportunity to be fucked--and a lot of other ones-- like I wasted my whole life: by being shy, timid,and polite.

But I don't want YOU to waste YOUR LIFE like I did.

And THAT'S why I do this blog, god dammit.



  1. Is there a question in there somewhere?

    1. No.

      Nor do you have any answers, because there ARE no answers. There are no questions. There are only FACTS. Everything else is illusion.

      BE, and stop THINKING about everything.


  2. Most amazing blog ever. Literate, fascinating, unabashedly perverted. Can't figure out whether to applaud or to mourn. Or to even believe. Best wishes. -- Steve

  3. > Most amazing blog ever.

    Yeah, yeah. Since I moved to blogger from myspace, my hits went from a high of 117,000 to 700/day: THREE orders of magnitude. And that's base 10, not base 2!

    > Literate, fascinating, unabashedly perverted.

    That's me! Too bad I can't turn that into money, or better yet, understanding of the universe.

    > I can't figure out whether to applaud or to mourn.

    Then take SSRIs. The answer will become so obvious you'll hate yourself for so pigheadedly refusing to try them.

    > Or to even believe.

    Oh ye of little Fayeth!

    Look, I stopped responding to that years ago because no matter what tricks I did that they asked for, unbelievers still never believed. It always just led to jumping through more hoops, holding up more signs, writing more names on my cunt, recording more vids, going to more bars at high noon, and a whole lot of other shit (all described as it happened, or ask the regulars).

    Finally, I had to just let some people be WRONG. That, for some reason, is VERY difficult for me. Like when that happens at work, it breaks my heart (i.e., "No, I'd rather do it the way I always have. It only takes a week or so", or "We don't need to buy a tape backup unit"). See my FAQ.

    Ultimately, it comes down to Occam's razor. Yeah, I MIGHT be an old fat bald underpants guy in a basement (as he's usually described), or a teenager fooling the adults, or a rich crazy old cat lady, several people together creating a fictional character, a sociology masters' thesis, a government trap for porn watchers, or any of the other shit people suggest.

    BUT IT'S MUCH, MUCH MORE LIKELY that there really is a person on the internet who is THIS crazy, than it is for someone to simulate everything I am, where I live, the stuff I've taken pics and vids of, and 6,000 blog entries for almost a decade. For free. For no reason.

    Not to mention the two of you who fucked me.

  4. Replies
    1. Presumably, some too-cool, oh-so-leet gamerz inside reference.


    2. Living in a cave and being able to be self-sufficient would allow mw to remain permanently naked and be able to masturbate all the time. I'd like to be there with you!!

    3. You and every guy on the net!


  5. Goddamn Faye i do idolize the fact that you've managed to pull this off. I'll tell you that if you ever need to move there are many places in New Mexico you can hide and stealing the utlities here is as easy as fucking you ;)

  6. Replies
    1. [Curtsies] Why THANK you, Martin!

  7. I have a few questions, if it's okay to ask. How often do random strangers come to fuck you? What kind of people are these random strangers? What do you usually do when you're not masturbating?

    1. > What do you usually do when you're not masturbating?

      I dunno. Physically, I make food, clean, stuff like that. I also learn cool things. Right now I'm reading Brian Greene's latest book explaining why time is an illusion. I also explain a lot of stuff yo you guys here, like spontaneous symmetry breaking.

      What I am doing in an email window right now is helping a grad student aspie internet friend in Germany use pseudometrics in a Hausdorff completion. The challenge isn't in doing his homework, it's showing HIM how to do it. I'm doing it under my real last name though, so he doesn't know about my blog.

      He's real cool but introverted, and I wish like HELL I could turn him on to this pro-fuck blog because (hopefully) it would help him a lot to function in social contexts (i.e. get laid). It has helped a couple of others a LOT. But sadly, no one, anywhere, EVER can know my RL identity and the blog at the same time, and I feel like in this case it's very tragic and it makes me sad.

      If I do break the seal between worlds once, then I'd also do it again, for another nice-guy I can trust. But I've already discovered that you can't allow yourself to believe "nice-guy I can trust" about strangers on the internet. Eventually someone would "flip" and hate me for no reason they can explain. The first was Swag a few years ago, who went on a RL vendetta to fuck me over because I wouldn't tell him the location of my cave.

      The most memorable "flip" was Clare Lilliston. She sent me naked pix and deliberately induced me to feel sexually dominating of her (my first time not being the "sub"), and even promised to do a live naked show for me where she'd do anything I told her. Being the "top" was very scarey to me, but when I eventually conquered my fear and said okay, she said "Too bad! I'm not interested in talking to you anymore", and refused to say why, and it hurt me because it was the first time I was (to have been) dominating instead of submissive, and I was taking a huge (emotional) risk.

      Anyway, eventually someone who knew my real last name would flip and get mad at me and call my ex-coworkers and professors, and tell them how the department valedictorian student and respectable engineer has become a homeless disgusting loser who posts pictures of her cunt, masturbates for strange men for free, and craves being impaled by a railroad spike through my bellybutton while being raped.

      There are people who I don't want to know about that.

      You can't omit one gasket in the submarine's hull just because you feel sorry for it.

      I just hate to help the german kid in topology only. Because meromorphisms are SO much less important than mere "Oh!" orgasms.

  8. Also, I applaud you and your blog.

  9. > How often do random strangers come to fuck you?

    Other than the one time in 2002,never.

    > What do you usually do when you're not masturbating?

    Trying to figure out WTF is going on. But I'm too stupid even to understand things other people have already figured out,like quantum chromodynamics. Hell,I only just BARELY understand quantum electrodynamics.

    When I consider the number of important things I don't understand plus the important things nobody understands, I know WTF is going on about as well as my kitty-cat.

    The fact that I'm "Real Smart" when measured bv stupid-people metrics is completely irrelevant.

  10. This blog is great shock value for some.
    I'm intrigued, not shocked. It appeals to my twisted sense of reality also.
    If we meet it will be sweet and painful.

    1. Yeah, well if we do meet (i.e. if you find me in my cave) do NOT talk to me! It's the surest way to make me panic and run away. In fact, my A/C unit is positioned so I can do that if I'm backed into the corner.

      Instead, just silently start doing stuff to me. I *WILL* be naked, and as soon as I see you're not going to talk to me, I'll lay on my back, spread my legs apart, and offer my cunt and ass hole and the rest of my body to you to use in any way you like. You'll find lube to my left, next to the radio. You can do, literally, anything you want to me.

      I would HOPE you'd take off your belt and whip me until I cry before raping me (and then just walk out). I'll try hard to keep holding my legs open while you beat my stomach, hips, and hairy vulva with your belt (or a thin sapling branch) as hard as you possibly can. If I fail you in that by making as much as a whimper, I request you strangle me to unconsciousness so I wake up alone, in pain, completely covered with cigarette burns and bleeding welts (even my face), and full of leaking cum.

      The very first thing I'll do is masturbate until I twitch in orgasm really, REALLY hard.

      But in reality, you worthless dorks are far more likely to stand there and blab on and on. "Gee whiz, Miss Kane, I never thought I'd find you! Why, I read your blog every day, and..." blah-blah, while I push the A/C unit out the window.

  11. **Caution** This may sound extremely lame,

    I was actually on /g/ drunk on whiskey when you posted.
    Just to satisfy my own curiosity, do you actually browse that place regularly like i do ?, or was it just a one time thing.
    After reading all about you on your blog, i just really wanted to know.

    Don't get too cold out there,

    Guy from Amsterdam.

    1. > Just to satisfy my own curiosity, do you actually browse that place regularly like i do?

      Where, Reddit? No, I don't hang around any forums that are just talk except physics sites, where I use my real name.

      I used to use "Kane", but to embarrass and humiliate me, a man made me send a pic of my ass hole to my serious physics sites once while he was dominating me. I only sent it to one site (which promptly banned me). But to prevent the mixing of worlds again, I now only do physics and engineering sites using my real last name. I still use Kane for IT sites though.

      The only time I go to reddit or similar sites is when I follow a huge hits spike at my blog.

      sometimes I see what's going on at 4chan, since Anonymous is doing all those good works for humanity.

    2. Oh, wait! You said /g/, which means 4chan.

      They won't let me back there because at the end of a pretty cool rap (not about myself), I posted a link to my blog. While you can post links to any other blog site, they have something against blogspot. That was it, banned. No warnings. And no indication that blogspot is so hated.

      That's one example of why they're just dumb kids. I don't want to go back to 4chan. When someone doesn't like me, I IMMEDIATELY leave, and never come back. In fact, that's why I just walked out of B_____ nuc engineering. They loved my work but hated ME.

  12. Hey, I can't believe i found your blog, the fucking random paths the Internet leads you on...you seem like a truly good person, and much more in touch with yourself than most people are.

    I am another white nerdy guy and I'm pretty much the opposite sexually from what you've described, i like how you pointed out that stupid guys are more sexual than nerdy guys, I'm sure it's true, but I want to know how to break out of that, how to have intelligence modify sexuality instead of restrict it. So I was wondering what you would say about that?

    Also, fuck yes brian Greene and science! If I knew where your cave was I would totally sit and talk about quantum mechanics. You're awesome, keep up the good work.

    1. > If I knew where your cave was I would totally sit and talk about quantum mechanics.

      That's why I don't tell anyone where it is.

      Now, if someone discovers me, ties me to a tree naked, and whips me to semiconsciousness before raping me both vaginally and anally while I cry, then leave me slumped against my ropes deep in the woods where nobody can find me, THAT would be different.

      But nerds only want to talk about quantum mechanics. That's why girls don't like you. To much stalk, not 'nuff action.

      What you worthless dorks don't realize is that we WANT you to fuck us

      ...and we DON'T want you to ask permission.

    2. Plus, I don't actually know much about QM. (Well, except relative to normal people, I suppose. But that's not a metric I ever use). My specialty is SR. I don't even know enough about GR.

    3. I am very bright. Cursedly so. I used to have social issues, especially with women when I was young. Then I met an older submissive fuck hole with the self-esteem of a sloppy fuck hole on the net. I fucked and degraded her with ever increasing brutality until I could pull her pants down publicly, hold her throat firmly and dry fuck her hole until it gushed and her knees literally wobbled in orgasm. I observed that intercourse in the traditional, consensual manner never brought her to climax but brutally using her box on my schedule coupled with verbal degradation always made her have deep uterine contraction orgasms. After years of that type of experimentation, I finally admitted to myself that my intellect does not set me apart. I too am an animal with the overpowering and primordial need to pump my seed into cunts. Yes, I generally feel badly about what I've done shortly after I've ejaculated, but it usually fades within 20 to 30 minutes when the mind altering need to seed returns. Unfortunately, I have not been able to breed a total stranger's fuck hole due to the loss of freedom risk being too high in this world/era. Generally, I stick to girls who have put out consensualy first, usually after some psychosexual dominance. After a girl puts out you can take it any time and any way you want it. They will generally keep putting themselves in situations where you can take them because by taking away their choice, you relieve them of their guilt. Just like I need to rut and seed, girls need to be rutted on and seeded.

      Thank you Faye and all the honest and in touch women out there for doing your part in educating intellectuals on the only thing that really matters about being a man and inversely a woman. Bravo Faye.

      Note to geeks: If you fuck a girl's face hole aggressively and through the throat sphincter, the gagging will produce a very thick and acidic saliva which makes for the best anal lube.

    4. Really..., I think you must be her dream lover. You must be very bright to have written all that. Just remember when you meet her to not talk.

  13. Why did you stop blogging, are you ok?

    1. I share my paxil and welbutrin Rx with two other people I know (in exchange for them paying CVS for it), and that leaves not enough for me. The little I take works though, because I'm not sitting in one spot and crying for days, and trying to pull out my teeth with pliers again because they hurt and I can't afford a dentist.

  14. Can YOU make a circle from straight lines?

    1. I can. I can construct all the conics using a square and a pencil. The constructs are only approximations of an abstraction, of course, but that goes for any circle you're ever seen.

      --Aleph(not OP)

    2. Fucking troll.

      And ANYBODY can make a circle from a straight line. Fix one end and make the line a radius, then rotate the other end around the center.

  15. Thea Avaktavyah ConiferousAug 16, 2012, 10:41:00 PM

    You should buy or get hold of the book "Avadhuta Gita".. All Vedic philosophy condensed. All-pervading, all-relevant, untouchable insight. Lose yourself from attachment to concept; will compliment your already accumulated mathematical/physical knowledge, instincts and desperate efforts for understanding the outside world by revealing the inside one and then explaining how they are really the same, but i'm not sure if you instinctively understand this already. ;)
    Also, I sent you an e-mail (enthea92@hotmail.com), would be fun to start a hopefully long-lasting philosophical correspondence-relationship.
    (Pardon any linguistic incompetance, english is not my native language.)
    Much love etc ♥

    - Thea Avaktavyah Coniferous

    1. No fucking way.

      I had a boss who kept trying to push that bullshit on me. He pretended that it was logical and scientific, but got mad and emotional when I pointed out things that disproved his shit.

  16. How is living in the woods working out for you. I live in the woods too. Yes I'm homeless as well. Look forward to your response.

    1. > How is living in the woods working out for you?

      Jes' peachy!

      > I live in the woods too.


      > Yes I'm homeless as well.


      Well, move in with me and you can fuck me all the time. (Jeez, where do these guys come from?)

  17. Hey Faye..It took me more thn 3 hours to read all your Blogs and all the index of your 3 days fucking and that is something I read and believed... 1. You dont beleive in Love and nor in interaction or words while making sex 2. You love to get whipped and tortured, dumpin u in a closet or trunk naked, loose you whn want to use 3. Any men is allowed to sex with you nd fuck you till his cruelty and aggressiveness and can hurt you like anything.... 4. u want that man should use you as a sex object till his extent nd till he fulfills his desires with your swollen cunt nd anal crack..
    Gosh.... you r a Sex Goddess ....I stays in India and i m 26 .. till so far I have studied this society , world, love I says such things no where exists but yes I believe you and would love to visit you while crawling on your body like some rattle pinching and biting every inch of your Skin nd watching the tears coming out of ur eyes....
    Though u have moved in HOuston with two of your friends serving them food, cooking nd your nude body.....And u said tht in order to bang you One shud have to keep watching you to go out for of the house and kidnap you nd drive you in the woods banging nd whipping your ass and fucking you like animal and leaving you there nude and you wont remebr the car plates and face .... I am happy that you got a deal to stay in that Houston House as a family and wearing restrctions not to welcome or allow any of the visits from your Blog Followers.... But If I ever get to Houston, surely i will kidnap you nd will fuck you no matgter how old you become or how loosen your cunt or ass crack gets.....really want to humiliate you and make u obey my words commanding you to kneel down on your knees for more thn 40 minutes.... dargantes@yahoo.com

    1. I am not attracted to pakis or Indians.

      Except the kind of Indians that jump around in a circle in loincloths with a feather hat, swing a tomahawk in the air, going "woo-woo-woo".

      THEY can fuck me, hopefully when they're drunk on firewater so they don't TALK to me.

  18. hi i love ur blog i left u my phone number on xhamster im in richmond va and i want to cum use ur fuck holes and claw you and rape u till u cry like a dumb cunt

    1. 1) You and every guy on the net.

      2) I don't have a phone (I have one, but no service).

      3) I will NEVER talk to anyone on the phone again because I HATE it. I feel like I'm on stage and I don't know what the play is. Except business stuff, like vendors at work. I'm okay with that because it's not personal.

      4) The one time time I DID try to call a reader (a girl in Annapolis who wanted to keep me under her bed and take me out to torture me), it turned out to be a guy. The regulars can tell you all about that. Ever since I found out that santa claus was a lie, I keep swearing I'll never get fooled again, but it keeps happening anyway.

      5) I'm not a free prostitute who meets guys to fuck in their cars during their lunch break. That's not being grabbed, dragged into a van, raped continually for hours, and dumped naked behind the dumpster in an alley behind a liquor store—which is what I want to happen.

    2. if only you lived in the woods in nova scotia. i'd chain you to the wall in my basement and rape you for a looooong time. id throat fuck you until you puked everywhere then id push your face in the puke and ruin your asshole with my thick cock

    3. > if only you lived in the woods in nova scotia.

      If only this, if only that...

  19. Hey Faye, just wondering when you moved into the hidey-hole from your group living situation? jill

    1. I can't give dates because I lie about my age. When you lie, you're always asserting a contradiction. In the present case, that means it is literally impossible for me to provide an internally-consistent chronology, and I've learned not to try. And even if I could come up with one, it would still be inconsistent with reality, and I really, really don;t like that.

      Sorry! :-(

  20. Oops ~ never mind Faye, I see you've been 'rescued' then. How old are you, do you mind? Thanks, jill

    1. I lie about my age and doctor my pix.

  21. I have the same old radio (ok, I admit I actually have 3 of them) and scanner LOL as you, and more of course. I am a geek, very anal and pedantic, an assassin in mind, heart, and body. Yes, I am INTP. Cheers to you and your cave!

  22. Wow, you are amazing. how does one reach you?

    1. With one hand on your dick and one hand on my pic.

  23. you are weird and obviously very spoiled.

    1. > you are weird


      > and obviously very spoiled.

      How? I don't see it.

  24. stalking the wild troglodyte LOL

    1. Also Sprach Zarathustra


  25. I'd rape you in the shitter, don't want to get aids though.

    1. If you fuck me in my ass, it's far more likely that I would catch aids.

  26. but you did ignore my 11/20 comment! you did write that you reply to all email. to become a baby one must take up the burden first, y'know,

    1. > did ignore my 11/20 comment!

      I don;t see it. and it wasn;t on purpose.

      > to become a baby one must take up the burden first

      Yeah, as a camel. But you forgot the lion between the camel and the baby.

  27. Your a loser in misery or miserable filled with loss. Best thing you can do for yourself and the world, is kill yourself.

  28. Faye, I looked at you pics and you are hot. I'm 63 this May and was wondering if you would do an old man a favor, would you lay me? At my age I find it hard to find women that are willing. And damn, you are a fine looking woman. I love the fact that you are an outdoors person and doing it alone. I was a truck driver for over 20 years and loved the solitude of the job. Now I'm not begging, gave that up years ago, but to spend some time with you would be great. Ron

    1. do an old man a favor = do an old man

      Sorry, but I'm not attracted to old men. It's not by choice. Gays aren't attracted to me, and I don;t take it personally.

      Buy a prostie!

  29. Hi faye what blog hot hot. How do follow your blog

  30. I just had a cruel and amusing thought. Upon the silent "flipping of the switch" leading to the offering of two input ports, proceed to tie you down. Once you are completely and utterly immobilized, begin conversing and refuse to do anything other than talk. What if you start screaming? Ball-gag, give you a simple 2 button input device, let you know that left is . and right is -, place a Morse code chart in front of you, and continue to talk to you like a human being. You may continue your muffled scream, or you may attempt a digitized scream based on ancient telegraphic technology, and I'll just sit there watching you squirm, and continue to ask about current events and attempt to bring up politics despite your complete separation from these subjects.

    I guess I'm just a cruel and sadistic person.

    1. All men are. But you sure have some geeky masturbation fantasies!

  31. You are the most fascinating woman I have seen on the internet. Your brain must be some sort of awesome. I'll admit that you make me think very dirty thoughts.

    1. The thoughts were always in you. You just forgot them, that's all.

      I'm here to help you remember.

      And why not? They're as much "you" as you are.

  32. Im 19 and im geeky and attractive but all i get in this world is complete retards that want me but you you are perfect a great head on your shoulders older and just every thing i would like to change about the world .you attract me so much i would like to come rape you in your cave with my bbc and cum in every hole and suck it out of you .where are you located :I

    1. "bbc." Troll. Ain't bitin'.

    2. > where are you located :Iou located?

      Meet me back the railroad track.
      Stick your dick all up my back.

    3. LOL i like your style bitch. ;) good stuff.

    4. Why THANK you, Ray! [blushes...]

  33. goddamn you are my kind of bitch. i would fuck that asshole and pussy caveman style 24/7

  34. goddamn you are my kind of bitch. give me that fuckin cunt and i will take it from you.

    1. If I give it to you, you haven't taken it from me. You have to take it from me WITHOUT me giving it to you.

      Only then will you deserve it.

  35. http://xhamster.com/user/fukthaworld88

    1. Damn, dude, you're the king of uploading DP vids!

      Unfortunately, the girls are all high-heeled Hollywood whores and the guys are all nee-groes.

    2. yeah i like my bitches trashy NOT classy.

  36. Heya... Ok. I need to comment on your blog. I've been reading your blog over these past few days. I can't remember how I happened to run across it. I think I ran across someone's profile on xHamster and, if I remember correctly, I saw a story/blog post there and read it. Included in it was a reference to your blog and the location of same. So, I checked it out and I've been more or less mesmerized by it since. I've gotten lost in reading many of your blog posts, for hours at a time, and found a ring of truth in what I've found there. I'm not one of those who thinks your an internet fake. Too much of what I've read in your blog has a certain ring of truth and honesty. And I like the way you talk about sex, about being taken by any random guy who has sufficient balls to grab you and fuck you. And, I have to say, your photos are among the hottest, sexiest, most raw stuff I've seen. This one in particular: https://lh3.ggpht.com/-IVXioG9mPpM/UKBsJbBlK0I/AAAAAAAARsg/Nq0h86-01-E/s640/03.jpg, and others really drive my libido and make me fantasize about finding you in your former cave, grabbing a fistful of your hair, pushing your face down onto your bed and beastfucking you while spanking and whipping you, feeling your pussy and your asshole clinch around my cock while I'm raping you, as you and I both know you desire. I don't care that you don't care for black men. I am black, and honestly, I think the experience of grabbing you and raping your hungry little holes would be even more exciting and satisfying for me (and, perhaps, for you) because of the fact that you, while you have announced that your mouth, ass and pussy are available and waiting for anyone willing to take them by force, have specifically stated that your are NOT available in that way to black men. Please know that I would fuck you anyway, and I would relish doing so knowing that you have no desire to have black cock inside you. I would enjoy forcing my black cock inside you regardless of your distaste for black men. I am fascinated by your enjoyment of teasing, taunting, craving any man who would be so bold as to strip you naked and take you by force. I like reading your blog, and I like thinking about what a complete sexual animal you are and your willingness to submit to those who are determined to fuck the shit out of you. I would especially enjoy fucking you if you fought and tried to resist my black cock penetrating you. You are interesting, but mostly, you are fuckable, very fuckable, and I really like that you know this.

    Post some new pictures....


    1. > I don't care that you don't care for black men.

      But that doesn't make me care for them, which is why I didn't read any farther than that statement.

      Plus, you have no idea how boring it is to read (mainly in email) "Faye, I want to do this to you, I want to do that to you..."

      Well you CAN'T. We're lin different states, I hide my location, and you don;t even know my last name.

      SAY! Why don't you stop fantasizing about doing things to ME and substitute that girl at work into the same fantasies? The important thing is to have those fantasies while you're talking to her instead of thinking how she probably wouldn't like you and probably already has a boyfriend.

      The very fact hat she's talking to you means she wants you to strip her naked and rape her. SHE'S an animal too, you know, born only to mate and die, just like you.

      ...Unless she's talking about the Load phase of ETL, skyshine factor of a shield geometry, APT malware, or the metallicity of pop II Cepheids.

      Then talk about that instead.

  37. Replies
    1. At the top of every blog page, but I'm WAY behind in answering them.

  38. Replies
    1. Yeah, like the moon landings.

      Tell it to the couple that "rescued" me and the readers who've fucked me.

      Those sets intersect though, because the couple that rescued me fucked me, too. So did my "biggest fan."

      YOU can't have any until you change that attitude!

  39. I feel sad for the people who read this and actually take your advice:
    "The very fact hat she's talking to you means she wants you to strip her naked and rape her. SHE'S an animal too, you know, born only to mate and die, just like you."
    You do know people go to jail for that shit right?

    1. People who smoke dope also go to jail, and there's nothing wrong with that, either.

      But unfortunately, no rapist has yet attributed it to my Church Of What You Really Are. One guy (Wolter) did send his shrill, harpie wife back to Japan because of me, though. The new self-confidence I engendered led him to quit his crappy job and start his own company. Now he has 40 employees.

      Did you know that 60% of women cum while they're being raped? I posted hilarious explanations by a feminist from an academic journal. She bends over backwards to avoid the simple, obvious explanation. The other 40% couldn't quite get there because the rapist cummed first.

  40. Replies
    1. It seems you forgot that you are.


  41. Not easy to make the decision to break the chains.

    1. You don't have to "make a decision" to do it, or to do anything else. There IS no "decision," there is only ACTION, what you physically DO. That's all that counts. Everything else is just sitting there yanking off.

      Start by finding a place to make a cave. It has to be near an electricity junction, like a streetlight. Then buy a small tent, clear the area, and set up the tent. Hopefully, you picked a power junction that nobody will see you unscrewing the cover and hacking in. Then run power to your cave, buy a foam mattress, an A/C unit, and a space heater. Cover your cave with layers of old blankets and plastic sheeting. Fix your laptop so it gets internet from your cell phone system. That involves buying a USB internet gizmo from your carrier.

      Bring water in, and buy about 20 MREs. Then hang around in it more and more instead of your isolation module (what I used to call my apartment). Fix it up with lights and stuff. Then one day you'll realize that you don;t actually have to ever come out.

      Here, watch this. It's only 30 seconds: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qt9MP70ODNw

      There are no "decisions"; what you actually DO is all there is.

      There IS no "good".
      There IS no "evil".
      There is only FLESH.

  42. Whatever you do is your own business, but this is still beyond fucked up.

    1. Fucked up? Fucked up, you say?

      Here's my hip 'n happnin' ontology:

      There are three kinds of things other than my own thoughts: objects, other people's opinions, and mathematics.

      Guess which one I don't give a fuck about.

  43. hey faye

    of course people look at us like we are strange. they are just as scared of us as we are of them.
    only difference is that we SHOULD be scared of them.

    a guy moved near to me frm rehab last week, i offered him a freview tv boxand told him id found it in a skip - he turned his nose up at me - this is a guy living on welfare in england with a flat paid for by benefits,and just out of rehab paid for by the state - and the fucking prick still held the unbelivable snobby stance that "a free, freview box from a skip was not "good enough" for him.
    i go out picking fruit n veg from the wild - as i guess u do - u wouldnt belive how many 18-22 yr olds see me picking frm a plum tree and say "eugh! what are those?"...thats right - WHAT ARE THOSE. IS it awful of me to sumtimes wish for a global disaster - so that these fucking molly-coddled morons would starve (with no boxed meals) while i dined like a king on natures fayre?

    anyway. long ago did i stop trying to adapt myself to fit into their sick world. long ago did i stop trying to hide my nature,views and lifestyle from"society"
    AND long ago it was when i started to love myself for who and what i was.

    to take this route in life faye, gains u much respect from me (not that i hold myself up as someone whos respect should be coverted)
    what i mean is, you have TOTALLY relinquished the concept of "modern society" - sumthing ive not been able to do.

    and on a side note, (but no less important) im afraid that i would have no time for the tying up and restrains.
    just to grasp you from behind,wrap ur hair around my hand and force you face down - then sink my teeth into ur shoulder nback while my cock splashed in and out of your piss-wet and red-raw cunt and ass.
    the more accepting of my life and opinions i become --- the more animalistic a become my sexual fantasies. you are right - you DO exist to service me.

    PS im reasonably intelligent - although my families working class background afforded me not inductions in oxbridge style universities
    the good old english class system strikes again.

    but i would like to hear you theories on time travel - Myself, i belive it that history proves that time travel will never exist in the future. i do not need to explain my theory further to YOU. but for others reading i will briefly explain my reasons - you have a time machine...where do you go first? then where do you go second? like i said,history proves that time travel will NEVER exist.

    would love to here ur theories faye.

    1. Well I'm glad you are who you are, since most people aren't.

      I'm also glad you want to rape me, but you're not exactly alone in that. I just wish it would happen somehow instead of everybody talking about it. I actually feel stupid talking about it myself. It's like casually talking about God.

      As for time travel, it is impossible. Mass is momentum moving forward in time, just like light is momentum moving in a direction 90º away (i.e., all 3 directions of space). You can rotate the direction the momentum moves in (i.e., accelerate the mass), pointing it more in the space direction, but at the cost of not moving so fast in the time direction (i.e., time dilation). You can't rotate momentum (i.e., mass) a full 90º away so NO momentum is in the time direction (causing time to stand still for the object) because then by definition it's not mass, it's light (EM radiation). BTW, that's why light doesn't experience time. Its momentum is completely in space. Also, that would be accelerating mass to c, which is impossible for other reasons.

      To go back in time, you'd have to rotate MORE than 90º while still being mass. Since mass can't even reach 90º, this is impossible.

      Note that antimatter is mass which ONLY moves backwards in time, but it can't ever become normal mass for the same reason as above.\

      Hmm, I'll write a new blog item about this.

    2. PS:
      > history proves that time travel will NEVER exist.

      By "History," I assume you mean the fact that since we know what happened in the past, it can't be anything else. Like a coin that's been flipped, it can never be heads if it's lying on a table tails up (which sounds real sexy!)

      That's convincing to me too, but it isn't literal "proof" of anything. For example, if reality split into two realities when a time traveler appeared (as in the many-worlds interpretation), your "proof" would be shown to be wrong. BTW, the many-worlds interpretation is itself wrong, if you're curious.

  44. Hehehe.

    Lady, when I looked at the thread from Reddit, you piqued my interest. Now that I read your blog, you have arguably started and blown up my obsession.

    I am a 19 year old sex starved virgin who's shy, anti social, probably autistic, and doesn't know squat about how to even START on how to even fucking get free sex from a woman.

    But you, you encourage men to rape you, defile your body and violate it as much as possible. You have no idea of how high my horny level is right now. Reading your story, it's like I'm reading something that I'd see in fucking hentai doujins. I can't even fucking believe that it's real, but it is. And now I REALLY REALLY wanna meet you and force you to pop my cherry. I'm sick of being a good little boy. I'm sick of feeling left out because I can't even have sex with even the lowest valued women.

    But then I see that you don't have any interest in black men... No no no... This won't do, as I am black myself. Oh well, I'm still gonna fuck you if I ever meet you. Infact, I LIKE that you actually have no interest in black men. That only fuels my desire to fuck you even more. Now you're like a forbidden fruit that shouldn't be ingested. Oh how I will enjoy it, seeing your face cringe as you get impaled by an unwanted black rod. Oh how joyous it'll be that my finest moment will likely be your lowest moment. Yes, keep disliking at even the insinuation of a black man rubbing his cock against his cunt. It pleases me and will only serve to make your fucking even more rough and merciless than it will already be. Have you heard about all those stereotypes that used to exist about black men in the Jim Crow era? How we used to be painted as brutish gorilla-like rapists and such? That's what you'll get when you face me. You'll see. It's gonna be as if Bigfoot himself decided to ravish a little woman such as yourself.

    So prepare yourself. I don't know when, but I will fuck you. Whether you like it or not.

    By the way, I'll likely have some face paint on, so if you see a black guy that looks like an Juggalo reject? Well, that'll be me.

    1. > Lady,


      I'm serious!

      > when I looked at the thread from Reddit, you piqued my interest. Now that I read your blog, you have arguably started and blown up my obsession.


      > I am a 19 year old sex starved virgin who's shy, anti social, probably autistic, and doesn't know squat about how to even START on how to even fucking get free sex from a woman.

      My advice: do it anyway

      > But you, you encourage men to rape you, defile your body and violate it as much as possible.

      All women want that. But they don't admit it to themselves, just like guys suppress being insane fuck animals.

      > You have no idea of how high my horny level is right now.

      Yes I do, and I'm the only girl that does. 7 years ago I wanted to see what it's like to be horny like a man, so I slathered testosterone cream from the net all over me and never washed it off. Details somewhere on my blog. I wish I had an index. Basically, I became an insane whip me / fuck me monster. I walked around the woods completely naked for a long time and only BARELY stopped myself from walking around naked o the highway hoping to get raped. I compromised with myself by laying in the tall grass next to the beltway and masturbating with my cunt facing traffic.

      It gave me a mustache which went away, but it fucked up my voice permanently. Now it sounds gravely. I don't like it.

      > Reading your story, it's like I'm reading something that I'd see in fucking hentai doujins.

      Hmm, must be a jap.

      > I can't even fucking believe that it's real, but it is.

      Gee, thanks. I'm actually real.

      > And now I REALLY REALLY wanna meet you and force you to pop my cherry. I'm sick of being a good little boy. I'm sick of feeling left out because I can't even have sex with even the lowest valued women.

      Yeah you can, but even as horny as you are, your intellect STILL overrides all that and tells you that you ain't fo' shit.

      > But then I see that you don't have any interest in black men... No no no...

      yes yes yes.

      > This won't do,

      won't do... for YOU!

      > I am black

      Ooo, SNAKE EYES! I'm sorry sir, NEXT ROLLAH...

  45. you filthy fucking beast bitch!

    i wanna be your caveman and tame that mammal cunt you fucking animal. how do i get your email so i can send you pix and video?

    i am a 25 yr old white male and a sick and twisted sexual sadist. i also like mac n cheese. :) but who tha fuck doesn't?!

    1. fukthaworld88@gmail.com

      Lansing, Michigan

  46. Forget my first question

    Mulitiverse , brain theory , dark energy , dark mater , maybe if we put a label on something we will understand it better ??
    The universe is what 14, 352, 837, 654, years 5 months 14 days old approximately based on the red shift of the most distance objects
    Witch are moving away from us a nearly the speed of light and continuing to accelerate . Does this sound right to you????

  47. I must say your intellect is a bit intimidating to those of us with a average intelligence and confusing to
    simple halfwits . But you seem to have a deep desire and the possibly the ability to see things in there true light,
    giving some incite to some natures deepest mystery , maybe it takes a nearly an insane mind to see reality ( no offense )

  48. > your intellect is a bit intimidating to those of us with a average intelligence

    I never understood that. If Einstein walked in, I wouldn't feel intimidated. I'd yell "AGHHH! Zombies!" and run.

    >and confusing to simple halfwits .

    Yeah, but where does the intimidation come from? I'm not threatening you. To you normal people, everything is about your egos, about whether other people think you're "cool" or not, and it drives me crazy.

    I wish I was the stupidest person on Earth. Then I could finally get some answers to my questions about 4-dimensional DeSitter spaces.

    > maybe it takes a nearly an insane mind to see reality ( no offense )

    See, there it is. "No offense." A normal person would get offended at you saying I'm nearly insane. But it doesn't matter if someone says I'm X or Y. If I am, then they're telling the truth. If I'm not, then they're wrong. Where does the intimidation and one-upsmanship and feeling insulted come from?

    It's normal-people sickness, and it's why I moved into a cave.

  49. I never understood that. If Einstein walked in, I wouldn't feel intimidated. I'd yell "AGHHH! Zombies!" and run.

    >> wouldn't we all ??? at least the sane ones? I might ask him for a light , since I know he smoked , but that it.

    I wish I was the stupidest person on Earth. Then I could finally get some answers to my questions about 4-dimensional DeSitter spaces.

    >> I think you mean the most ignorant , since stupid by definition means you should have known by experience and still don't
    But not to worry we are all ignorant and stupid in someway , some more then others as you have already learned .( WTH is DeSitter Spaces? Never-mind )

    See, there it is. "No offense." A normal person would get offended at you saying I'm nearly insane

    >> Not necessarily , There is a deference between acting insane and truly lost your fucking mind shoot me in the head insane. see the deference?

    But it doesn't matter if someone says I'm X or Y. If I am, then they're telling the truth. If I'm not, then they're wrong.

    >>Aww yes , that's kinda a tuff one If you are what they say you are , their right , if your not and you don't care about them , Fuckem, and if your out
    of lube tell them to Fuck off . ( Better )

    Where does the intimidation and one-upsmanship and feeling insulted come from?

    >> Personal Insecurity and Stupidity ( seem to be a lot of that now a days ) just an observation

    It's normal-people sickness, and it's why I moved into a cave.

    I believe your wrong " normal-people sickness " is all you have experiences and most humans are Quick to judge and determine
    If something or someone pose any threat to them , and if someone doesn't fit the pattern or they can't relate to him / her then they are
    a potential enemy. to be avoided or ridiculed. I had my unfair share of that shit too .

    You only need one true friend. to place your trust in . don't give up , and quit fucking around get your paper's publish , just a suggestion


  50. I want to rape and dominate you while you try to cry from the pain of being brutally fucked in your dirty little asshole, but you won't be able to breathe. let alone cry because ill be choking you with my belt and telling you how much you deserve it.

    Now I'm going to masturbate and think of all the different ways i will fuck you

  51. http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2014/05/24/shooting-california-santa-barbara/9532405/

    One friend JUST ONE FRIEND ONE SINGLE MOTHER FUCKING FRIEND to prevent this madness

  52. In the same way I think that if a girl gets pregnant - whether through a relatonship or through rape - then ONLY the father of her unborn child should have the right to decide on whether or not she keeps the baby or has an abortion. The woman should have NO say in the matter whatsoever. It should be purely the man's decision.


  53. Correction posted by worthlessfem on blogger not Faye Kane

    In the same way I think that if a girl gets pregnant - whether through a relatonship or through rape - then ONLY the father of her unborn child should have the right to decide on whether or not she keeps the baby or has an abortion. The woman should have NO say in the matter whatsoever. It should be purely the man's decision.

  54. The best stuff I've ever read. Here's a little something for you to fantasize about: I am going to find you cave woman and set up my own cave not to far from yours but far enough. Then I'm going to ambush you coming back to your cave after one of your bimonthly ventures out, drag you by your hair to my cave and make you mine. Then I'm going to kick you out, back to your little cave. Afterwards I'm going to come by whenever I want, have my way with you and cum in or on you wherever I choose.Then we will live happily ever after, not talking to one another, you in your cave and me in mine. OK enough fantasy, here are a couple of things for u to think about seriously: 1 YOU CAN'T RAPE THE WILLING, if that is what u want and desire then its not RAPE, it's a sick perverted twisted fantasy. 2 How do you expect anyone to have unprotected sex with you after stating u have HEP.C from dirty needles!! And finally #3 What will do if u get pregnant?

  55. This comment has been removed by the author.

  56. Faye. It's been my fantasy to be tied up, drugged and fucked like a piece of meat but I'm scared. I play this scenario in my head but am scared I'll get some disease and I'll have to worry about giving it to my lovers and it will ruin sex for me in the future blah blah. I hold out for that shit like soulmates, but I'm scared ill be haunted by regret from my unfulfilled fantasy. I feel that deep dark NEED to be ravaged and used but with each fantasy fulfilled a new one appears. Reading about your fun weekend left me both sick and aroused. Maybe I'll learn to let it go or maybe some day in my future I'll be bound and fucked until I reach such a primordial level that I will finally have catharsis.
    - m/25

    ps I want to get fucked by animals do you?

  57. if your still living in that cave of yours im going to go lookin for you for these next few years cuz i aint got shit to do then try to find ,tie, and fuck you untill yu cry and squirt!!


► So what do YOU think, huh? Well?   Huh?